*Sunday, May 29, 2005*
wat to say leh... erm.. so many things on my mind... i wanna recollect things tt haf been happening from like yesterday nite till tonight.. so much to say... but.. need to go sleep soon.. so i'll try moi veri bestest.. haha...
tonight's service was juz awesome... how to say leh.. it took a lot of debating whether or not to come for this service. and i juz felt like i needed to leave my h/w and my sch responsibilities aside and juz come into God's presence and enjoy being in it for a little while... i felt like crap after Neap... this chem thingy... rach... nagging at me... jamie.. another one.. all coz i wasnt doing any practice exam papers... i wasnt really starting for my chem paper which is like in a week's time... as usual.. the lazy.. not stree till last min gurl was getting painful looks frm her schmates... sighz...
i finished the neap paper in the rmit lib... started on eng.. but decided tt i needed to go for a walk and called Juni along.. had a talk... had to commit a lot of pains and worries to her... and really ask for advice on wat to do.. and wat was right... really felt like giving up.. like all this work i've been doing dun reflect the pains i've gone thru.... like... the subjects i've choosen all dun seem right... like tests dun reflect tt i enjoy working on them... and i felt like shit... really bad abt sch life... was on the verge of saying... "time to juz redo yr 12 again.. and start all over again"..... was terrible...
decided i cldnt do nemore work.. so went to melb central and sat near the clock and chatted wif Juni somemore... felt.. tt i needed to do something abt my life.. and juz sit in His presence at church...
it was great... learnt a new song.. sounds powerful... was really great.... Russell's preaching was good... interesting.. abt us being prepared to recieve ppl into God's home.. but wat really shook a lot of us was this story he ended wif....
this gurl.. left home... her mother didnt know where she was... worried abt her.. staying up.. at a loss of what to do..
she went to a minister and asked him "what can i do to find my daughter?"
the minister told her to get some pictures of herself and passed it to him..
then he asked her "what message would you like me to write on these photos?"
the women, in tears replied " all i want is for her to come back."
the minister took the photos and went around to places of amusment, where he felt that her daughter might visit and requested that the photo was to be pinned up on bullentin boards where t could be easily seen..
one day, this daughter went to a pub and she caught sight of the picture. finding it familiar, she went up to it and saw that it was her mother's aged face.. looking so different and fragile from when she last saw her, with the words "come back" written on it. immediately, the daughter knew that it was written for her and could not carry on with her plans for the night. she went back home, packed her bags and caught the 1st train home to her mother.
upon reaching her mother's house, she was amazed to find that the door was left slightly open. she entered and saw her mother sitting up in bed, crying and praying for her to come back.
she rushed into her mothers embrace and both cried, hugging each other tightly. the 1st thing she asked her mother when she caught her breathe back was "mother, why did you leave the door open?"
her mother replied " my dear child, since the day you left, the door has never been shut"
how often have we tried to run away from God's pesence, how often have we felt that God didnt want us anymore coz we were unworthy and we were so insignificant in this entire world. How often have we felt like we couldn't do what He had planned for us coz it was too hard and it required a lot of effort... how often haf we felt tt God made a mistake creating us?
no matter how we sin, as long as we turn back, God sees our heart and His door is always open, to welcome us back into His presence. How much does God long for us to come, crying into His open arms, to recieve that comfort and peace that He so generously provides for us when we feel weighed down by matters of the world. "The lost Son" in Luke is a representative of how much God loves us... how He awaits patiently by our window and waits for us to turn back from our sinful ways and walk down tt road which He is standing at the end... How much does God so long to run up to us and clothe us wif clothes from His house, to call us "My Child, My wonderfully made child of God"? isnt He wonderful?
no more should i walk away from God... but juz press on, move forward and juz leave everything up to Him. easier said than done.. but then, the 1st step is always the hardest... at least i know tt i haf to try...
ling long picked a waterdrop @ 4:47 pm
